This would be helpful

Can we please just define some semiobscure little hand signal that means "yes, I want to sleep with you, OVER" . . . how often do you think it happens where two people pass each other in the street/morgue/bottom-of-the-nile and they both totally want it, but society requiring the existence of a bar in any room where such proposals are made causes them to stay stone-faced until out of sight?  Very frustrating, if only because my no-game ass would get a kick out of watching the frat guys looking like third base coaches.  ONLY UNLIKE THE COACH THEY'D BE QUITE FAR FROM THIRD BASE YESSSSSSSSSSS THAT'S THE WINNER BYE

Can you spell trichotillomania?

OH GOD IT DOESN'T WORK IN PRINT

Cool word though, means "the abnormal desire to pull one's hair out."

The normal desire to pull one's hair out occurs when an enraged Native American is charging at you with a tomahawk and you attempt to save him the trouble.

Get Up

You know those people who have glasses that are so thick that it makes their eyes into these giant puddles of bloopy black stuff?  What if you met a guy who was wearing those, and it just so happened he had a lisp and really liked to rock out to Disturbed, so when you saw him he was yelling GET UP COME ON GET DOWN WITH THE THICKNESS and you thought he was being funny in a self-deprecatory way about his glasses so you go "yeah it looks like you stuck a couple of beer steins on each eye"

and then the most awkward silence

We Do What We Can

we do what we can

is that when you break out? of course not
well you can practice you know this is andre hiiii andre
cause i know what i want and how i'm gonna get it (i'm unstoppable)
just a refresher keep in mind the buckeyes open with miami the redhawks
possible somebody else broke it not you mr nickelson you have to pay your debts sir
three days later when my husband and i went back into the shop to show me what he done
why were you sitting there? sorry this is the wrong place
i mean, i've been lost before, but here, i can't even ask for directions
use your turn signal, sound familiar?  allstate knows
bombardier beetle has several natural chemicals that are stored at safe
it is something that the united states is...has done itself
now your whole face and even a receding hairline natural before and after transformation
this window of opportunity will soon be closed
guys from sex and the city tuesdays at 9 and wednesdays at 10
are dialing in right now to get more than one different part for your home
over the labor day weekend okay? right away, they're going to take it right out of your credit card
buffalo!  buffalo!  high chief buffalo!
you've got the alternative so you don't need the death penalty
full line of hot tubs, all three with no obligation, call now and get a
bad news? from johannesburg.  is it my son?
children see a parent reading and they know that reading is an important thing
78 wilmington haze and 78 chesapeake temperature 80 degrees once again 3 am
that the Pope is praying for them, he also offered words of encouragement
if i walk another block it's waist-high moving to the superdome and beyond the otherside
first serve to make sure she gets it in; she won both points!
academy award winner tom hanks in forrest gump friday and saturday night
to watch play...he can play the same well i tell ya here ozzie guillen and john
start right end right
nice, quite a struggle, daughterty with a 1-up lead but deacon has the advantage there on 14
come on guys we don't get breaks!
call time warner cable today for the very best in home entertainment
i'm gonna call sandy and tell her not to come
try the 8-lb oreck xl hypoallergenic plus and the super canister
2 5 4 3 2, that's right charlie!
the candle goes out, new scented oil candles
the next thing i know we were picking up everything and started to
go on i'll catch up with you
her addiction is being a workaholic, she is very demanding of herself
let's just go vintage allllllllllllllll the way
you don't know that the Exocoms are life forms it is true i am acting on personal beliefs
less sugar, when he is on the outside, the goodness of quaker is on the inside
all about the revving of the motorcycle, he is so dramatic when he pulls up
i know i keep on getting into a fight with one of my roommates dad she called me a slut like a real slut
is it a making you a little more mature video?
part 1 2 or 3
myself as sort of like yeah a tuning fork it picks up and feels the energy in the air
matt, matt, goddammit goddammit
your session's not over

Hello

Time to blog again.